Wednesday, August 31, 2005

fair warning very early on

having started this whole web log thing again (if any of you remember the ubps days, you'll kindly also recall that you're probably considered a friend and forget them immediately), I think there are a few things I should set out right here at the beginning. Ground rules, for myself as much as anyone else, listed in no particular order of importance, and conveniently located here very near the beginning of this--if I may--"blog" where those reading in reverse chronological order might never find it.

call it potential hindsight correction. you know, in case someone else later on reads this whole damn log in reverse chronological order. I imagine some woman I'm interested in down the line settling down at her computer, all dolled up in her comfy clothes on a lonely, tipsy Saturday night and doing a little standard background checking. she finds this blog in some Google cache--or better yet, still going!--and starts with the most recent post. of course, it's witty and wry and ironic and oddly twisted and annoyingly self-conscious and she's intrigued. she keeps reading.

keep in mind, it's a long way back to this post, the one you're reading; these ground rules, this explanatory manual of painstakingly assembled context specifically to be referred to in the future, as the blog ages and matures and grows and blossoms. before that lady ever gets all the way back here, she reads all the fucked up ranting and idiotically lurid mind wanderings of this tortured soul.

she's really freaked out now--but she can't stop reading--when the insight calvary rides in and saves the day(/night/potentially positive nature of the relationship): she finally comes back to this post...

hang on one second, I smell something burning.

(10 minutes later)

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. I was talking about ground rules at some point. Well, here's number one, the first: No blogging while making dinner. I just freakin' scrubbed down my stove a half hour ago (down being a key word here; I removed a layer of "flavor" about a quarter-inch thick) and now here I am letting the pot boil over. And now here I am letting my dinner get cold. And now here I am still typing, dammit.

Fuck ground rules. Let's eat!

Currently Listening:
Songs On Radio Idaho
By The Actual

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